Updated: Oct 30, 2020
With early sun rays peeking through the red and yellow leaves dancing in the wind, my King and I just practiced Tai Qi together. Surrounded by the colorful nature on this glorious Virginia mountain top with every movement, each breath, we are ONE.
What a glorious day! Today is Samuel’s birthday.
Today and every day, I vow to honor him and celebrate him -- my best friend, my soulmate, my lover. How incredibly privileged I am to be in this King’s presence for almost 30 years!
In nearly three decades, we only spent two birthdays apart.
We were married on Christmas 1991 in Shanghai, China.
Twenty-three days later, Samuel was on the airplane to Carbondale, IL, a small college town with a population of 40,000.
At the airport, I remember telling myself “Don’t cry. Don’t cry.” Yet tears kept coming down like shining pearls broken from a string. Samuel finished up at the passport check counter, but he stepped back over the yellow ‘Don’t cross’ line on the ground to give me a final kiss. “Step back!!” a Border Control Officer ordered with no facial expression and a gun in his hand, maybe he was used to seeing these departure scenes at the airport.
I have heard stories of families being apart for years because one couldn’t get a visa to visit the other.
“Don’t cry, babe. You will be in my arms again very soon,” Samuel had reassured me. How would I have known that it would be 10 long months before I could see my Samuel again, and 8,000 miles away?
I was rejected for a visa to America to be with him. Again and again, I walked out of the general consulate of Shanghai heartbroken.
During those days, it took about two weeks for a letter to arrive from China to America, and a week and a half for a letter to arrive from America to China. So we decided not to wait on each other’s letters and wrote every day to stay connected.
Getting a letter from Samuel became the absolute highlight during those months alone. I was there when he bought his first $800 car. I was there when he went grocery shopping with six students crammed in a vehicle, on a snowy winter day from Carbondale to St.Louis, where the closest Chinese grocery store could be found.
Then on his 30th birthday, I walked into the general consulate in Shanghai, on the third try. Growing up in a communist country, we were taught there was no God, but I was praying, “Please, God, let the officer show Mercy. Please grant me the visa to be with my husband.” My prayer was answered. Miracles do happen. With the simple “Approved” stamped in my passport, I was granted entry to join my King.
Together, we have experienced many miracles together. Life has been a blessing.
The second time we were apart on Samuel’s birthday, was 24 years later. Once again, he was in America and I was in China. But this time it was by choice. I was teaching Feminine Leadership Embodiment in China. Understanding that was my calling, my King has always been the biggest supporter of my life work. This time no painful heartache and sadness. This time, only gratitude and appreciation.
If you ask Samuel what does he want for his birthday, he always replies, “I already have everything that I need. I don’t need anything more for my birthday.”
This year, Serena decided to do a special surprise birthday present for her Dad: a video of all his friends and family wishing him a happy birthday. One by one, these birthday wish videos came from all over the world: America, Africa, Asian, Europe and Australia.
Through different languages, people spoke the same qualities of my King: Solid, Kind, Wise, Present, a great father, an amazingly loving husband, a devoted son, a sweet brother, a fun uncle and a caring friend.
This particular message stood out: “Samuel has always impressed us as a deep thinker and a visionary. He is insatiably curious about the world around him and wanting to understand why things are happening in a certain way and what makes people tick. It’s evident the pursuit of growth makes him happy. He is a man of few words but he leads by example and influences others with actions. He is a kind soul. Solid, wise, humble and worldly. Serena and Norden are the apples of his eye and he’s totally dedicated to his family. It is inspiring to watch the deep love, connection, and interaction between WeiLi and him. Samuel is fun to be with and we enjoyed traveling with him on many adventure trips.”
He is a wise rooted person with deep friendships that have lasted for several decades.
Though Samuel is a very quiet and private person, he will always say yes when I open our home to my friends, especially to sisters on the same path. Samuel has always accepted and loved my friends from all over the world, and they are usually spoiled by my King when they come to spend time with me. Breakfast smoothies waiting for them downstairs in the kitchen after sunrise. At dinner, chef skills plus hospitality, Samuel often cooks up a feast, with gentle soft music adding a touch of life’s richness at its best.
Samuel and I have had our ups and downs just like any couple. The beautiful news is as we journey along together on this love and passionate path, we grow richer and deeper in our oneness.
If you ask me what is the secret sauce of our nearly three decades of loving relationship? I would say TRUST FIRST. There is a deep love developed because of the trusting relationship that we have built as a foundation.
What advice would I give to a new bride?
Praise your man. Praise him, praise him, praise him.
See a man into a KING, see his full potential, and he will BE one.